This week, we’ve been thinking a lot about weddings.
That probably sounds weird, considering our livelihoods are based around them. But, as with any profession, it’s important to occasionally have a good, hard ponder about why you do what you do, and not let the day-to-day blur your purpose. Today was that day of contemplation.
It was sometime this afternoon with a cuppa on the couch that something dawned on us. We realised what the most important thing about weddings was.
Ready for it? The most important thing about a wedding is that you do in fact, get married.
Sign the papers.
Seal the deal.
“I do” it.
Legally get bound.
It’s a realisation so bleedingly obvious it hurts. And here’s why it’s important.
Everything else, both before and after you sign those papers, is just a bonus (and a pretty big one). All the laughter, tears, story-sharing, eating, drinking and dancing are just big, fat cherries on top of what is otherwise, a pretty simple exchange involving a couple of signatures.
When you really get down to it, getting married is pretty basic. Yet, so many couples (us included – we’re definitely not immune), have moments of getting hung up on the details. There’s a lot of pressure to make it the best day ever, which means stressing about all the could-a/would-a/should-a things.
We’re not going to pretend like these things don’t matter – in fact, all the elements (like the venue, the styling, the food, etc) are the things that make the day special and memorable and YOU.
But I guess what we’re trying to say is that at the end of the (big) day, if you do in fact ‘get married’ in the legal sense of the words, then you should be stoked. Whether it was sunny or belting down with rain, whether the day’s proceedings stayed on schedule or everything ran late, whether the tables were set just as you planned or someone went styling-schitzo, you committed to sharing your life with the best person you know and you made it official. That’s seriously the. BEST.
We get what it’s like to be in the throes of wedding planning. Ahem, me in January: It’s just a pair of shoes, why am I spending three fucking months deliberating this? Noone will see them anyway, they’ll be under the damn dress. On one hand, you want to make sure you’re making the right decisions about All Of The Things, and on the flipside, you want to use your other hand to slap yourself for caring so much about seemingly trivial stuff. It’s all normal, let us assure you.
Just know, at the end of the day, it all melts away and the only thing that matters is you, that person, and that flimsy certificate (did you know the piece of paper you sign on the day isn’t even your real marriage certificate? You have to apply for the government-recognised version later on after the wedding! Ask your celebrant for all the dets).
Be kind on yourself bridechillas, and feel welcome to return here anytime you feel yourself sweating the small stuff more than you feel like you should. Have a great week ahead.