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Wedspiration > Advice > So we got married. Now what?
Advice
So we got married. Now what?
There’s so much info out there on every single, tiny little thing you ‘should’ be doing in the lead-up to your wedding. But what happens once the big day has come and gone? Amy shares one person’s insight into life-beyond-wedding.
what happens after my wedding?
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Words by Amy Parfett
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19 April 2015
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Ah, the big day. That seriously is the best way to describe it – it’s one massive day that seems to take forever to come and then is gone in a flash. So much work, time, cash and care goes into it. So many conversations are had about it. So much deliberation is made about so many details.

And then BAM – it’s suddenly there. And it’s joyous. The weekend of ours weddings were hands-down, one of the best times of our lives. You’re surrounded by your most important people, and they are just so damn happy for you. You get to eat, drink and dance with all of these important, happy people in an awesome venue. What’s more, you’ve just made the most powerful declaration of love to the most important person of all, so naturally you are the happiest human going. See a theme here?

It’s really amazing. Engaged readers, you have good reason to be excited. It’s as wonderful as you imagine it’s going to be. In fact, probably better.

But we’re getting carried away. In the end, it’s one day that demands so much in the lead up to it. There are endless pre-wedding guides online that detail how to manage stress/what to do one week out/your must-do checklist etc. But what about a few tips for after the wedding? Because, you know, life-after-wedding goes on.

Here’s a little advice we wanted to share, because we think we would’ve liked to read this in the lead-up.

 

Be prepared to feel a bit down in the dumps… or not. 

Sorry to start with a kind of crappy one, but we’ve had a few people tell us that after it was all said and done, they felt a bit low once life got back to normal. Which you can completely understand – all that anticipation, all those endorphins – and then it’s all over.

Personally, we felt fantastic after the wedding. We could finally sit and just blob for an hour if we wanted without feeling guilt that our time should be spent more productively than blobbing. We stopped receiving nagging phone calls from our mums (we knew we needed them, it’s OK) and we could stop scanning social media for wedding inspo – there were no more creative ideas needed. All. Done. Phewf.

So, the take away here is you may feel a little sad once it’s over but try look on the bright side – it’s over (if that makes sense?).

 

Make some new-marital-status resolutions

This is our #1 tip. Mainly just because it’s fun.

You’ve just shared lifelong promises to each other in the form of your wedding vows. For the most part, these will be pledges to love and look after one another forever, in a few more words. But how about more immediate and tangible agreements that better your life on a day-to-day, week-to-week basis?

People make resolutions for the new year, so we decided to make some up for our new marital status. They don’t have to be big things – more just stuff you’ve been thinking about for a while. For example:

  • No phones in the bedroom
  • Read a book a month
  • Introduce tech-free Tuesdays: no devices, no TV. Cards and Connect Four encouraged.
  • Go see a live band once a month

It’s been a few years since we got hitched and look, we’ve definitely slipped up on the resolutions we made, but they’re a great way to get the conversation flowing about what you and your partner hope for your short-term future together. You could even review and update them on your wedding anniversary.

 

Plan (another) holiday

You might have a honeymoon planned for immediately after the wedding or you might be holding off and doing it later. Or you might not be doing one at all. Whatever the situation, have something to look forward to once the wedding is over.

Even if it’s just a weekend away, do yourself a favour and have an adventure or two on the horizon – even after the honeymoon. We know you’re broke because you just got married, but camping is cheap. New places and new experiences mean you’re continually learning and making new memories with your partner. We’re no relationship experts but that’s got to be a good thing for your future.

 

Share your advice with engaged mates

Remember when you first got engaged? How you hardly knew anything about planning a wedding? How you didn’t really know any wedding vendors? Or any good sources of wedding info and inspiration? Everyone goes through this. Wouldn’t it be awesome if someone had sent you a lovely little message saying:

‘Hi friend, I heard you’re engaged! Congrats, super exciting. Hey, just wanted to let you know that if you ever need any help with any part of the wedding planning, I’ve just been through it all and would be happy to share recommendations and tips. Know it can be hard to know where to start so please feel free to quiz me anytime you need.’

YOU can be that awesome person! Sharing feels good and we promise the offer will be appreciated. Plus, you get to keep the wedding buzz flowing for a bit longer too.

~

So, has anything changed since we got married? No. Things are pretty much exactly the same. Which is exactly what we’d hoped.

Any new-marriage resolutions ideas? Share below – we’d love to hear.

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Looking for more tried-and-tested wedding advice? We’ve got stacks to share right here

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